Mini Adventure: You're A Phony
by Amara Deegan
Summary: This is what happens when Amara is unfamiliar with the local drink and the Doctor has to deal with it. 11/OC


**A/N: Just another silly little moment between Amara and the Doctor. This one was inspired by some back and forth between me and my sister over an IM chat. Thanks, Starbo!**

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"Amara! Amaraaaa!" The Doctor was calling out as he dashed around the bustling marketplace. He hadn't exactly lost her, but he needed to find her now.

Earlier, he had more of less blown her off while he became absorbed in the strange goings on around the city. It was one of the rare times Amara seemed off her game and was more a hindrance than a help. He tried to take the more graceful approach and suggested she should take in the sights of the alien planet. She still took it hard and stormed off while he muttered about human females and their hormones.

"Amara!" He called through the doorway of another shop.

"Geez, I'm right here, no need to shout!" Amara scoffed back. Turning around he saw she was right behind him.

"Oh good!" He was honestly relieved he found her in one piece. "We need to get out of here. Right now! I more or less got on the bad side of a mob boss."

"You mean you stuck your big nose where it doesn't belong. Again." She rolled her eyes, but followed him when he pulled her along with him.

"Yeah." He agreed giving her an odd look. She was never that rude to him.

"What did you do now? Hop on your left foot instead of your right at the ball?" It started out rude, but turned to giggles.

"What's wrong with you?" He took a few quick glances back as they pushed their way through the crowds towards where he had left the TARDIS. Coming up to it, he had to stop them short as a semi-circle of thugs barricaded them from reach the blue box.

"You're not leaving just yet, Doctor." A sharp dressed man emerged from the center of the brute force squad with a devilish grin. He clearly thought he had the situation well under control.

"Well, don't you look fabulous!" Amara stepped forward and gave a high arched snap at the word. The Doctor quickly jerked her back from going any further. "Ow! Hey!"

"Amara, seriously, what is wrong with you?" He harshly whispered to her. This was not like her at all.

"What's wrong with me? What's wrong with you!" She countered and pulled her arm back rubbing at it as if deeply bruised. The thugs gave unsure looks to their leader who looked on with a mix of amusement and confusion.

"Having trouble controlling your woman?" The mob boss joked.

"Excuse me!" Amara turned on him. "Who the hell do you think you are?" She stopped for a moment and turned back to the Doctor to whisper. "No, seriously, who is this?"

"That's the guy who I tracked the stolen artifacts to, but he's trying to pin it on me and—" The Doctor started to explain when Amara whirled back around on the guy with an accusing finger pointed at him.

"YOU'RE A PHONY! A BIG, FAT PHONY!" She shouted at him and then gave the Doctor a sloppy grin. "Thar you go. Problem solved!"

At first, he could only stare in stunned silence even as the group of thugs burst out in roaring laughter. After a moment of trying to comprehend what just happened, he rubbed a hand to his face. "Yes, Amara, 'thar we go'. Good job. A minute, please?" He asked to the group of men.

"Of course." The leader nodded to him while a few of the men still were trying to get a hold of themselves.

"Amara, are you drunk?" The Doctor took them a couple of steps further away.

"Nope!" She gave a thorough shake of her head sending her hair flipping around her head. "I haven't had a single thing to drink."

"Let me smell." He said unconvinced and leaned in for a quick whiff even before she could complain against it.

"Hey! You don't believe me?" Amara jolted back from him.

"Right now, not really. Are you sure you didn't drink anything, even if it looked like water?" He gave her a hard look.

"No! I just had a few pieces of fruit!" She stomped a foot and crossed her arms pouting.

"Fruit? Oh no… Did it look like a green peach?" He sighed having a good idea of what had happened.

"Yeah, how'd you know?" The pout was gone for a friendly attitude again.

"That IS their form of alcohol!" He chided her.

"Everything okay?" The leader laughed.

"Yes, fine, sorry." The Doctor walked back over to them. "Look, can we do this another time? My very, very naïve friend got into something she should have and we need some time."

"Did you just call me stupid?" Amara squinted at him. He in turn shot her a look that said '_Not now!_".

"Pardon?" The man asked before looking her up and down and adding in everything that had been happening. "Oh, I see. The green peaches, huh?"

"Apparently so." The Doctor nodded and then had to bat away Amara's finger from coming in to poke at his nose.

"How do you see around that thing?" She asked and he gave her a look that clearly translated as '_Unbelievable!_'.

"I remember my first time." The guy laughed and was chorused by a few of the other men nodding and muttering their understanding.

"Tomorrow. Let's say high noon?" The Doctor offered.

"I like a good old fashioned show down." The man beamed a smile.

"Right, see you then!" The Doctor grabbed Amara's hand and dragged her behind him past the men and into the TARDIS. Shutting the door behind he almost couldn't believe that had worked. Turning to face Amara ready to verbally reprimand her for her drunken folly it died on his lips when he was met with her smiling just as wide as the mob boss and her hands on her hips.

"Was I good, or was I awesome?" She asked.

"I…What?" He was utterly confused for the moment.

"Come on, you know me better than that. You're always trying to get me to just dive in where ever we go, especially with the food, but there's a reason I don't. Call me paranoid, but I do worry about how things will taste and what they will do to me. I saw the green peaches and I asked someone about them. They told me it basically gets you drunk." Amara explained perfectly calm and sober.

"So why the act?" The Doctor crossed his arms not sure he liked that he had been tricked in such a way.

"I was getting bored waiting for you so I came back to the TARDIS and saw those guys waiting for you. I was going to just find you and warn you, but then I started thinking about it. How could we get back inside with them guarding it? The usual distractions came to mind, but then when I was trying to catch up to you in the marketplace when you were looking for me I passed a stand with those peaches and it reminded me of something one of my friends did to get out of work." She smiled all through the explanation.

"Your friend pretended to be drunk to get out of work?" He raised a suspicious eyebrow at that.

"Well, he was out of the country with his boss for an audit, so he pretended to be unfamiliar with how strong the local drink is to get out of a few redundant meetings that he didn't really need to be there for so he could explore around more." Amara told him. "I just pretended to be drunk as a distraction."

"You could have told me." It was almost a pout.

"Then it wouldn't have worked as well. Sorry." She gave a sheepish grin. "I just can't believe how well it worked!"

"No kidding." He turned to look at the door as if to make sure they really had made it inside.

"No matter why he let us go, are going to come back at noon tomorrow?" She asked.

"Nah! I think by noon tomorrow we'll be on a beach." He strolled past her to the console. Reaching into the beast pocket of his jacket, he pulled out an object and tossed it to her. She caught and saw it was a small Chinese looking dragon statue made of solid diamond. "Besides, we need to be returning that artifact to the Counsel of Antiquities right about now."

"You had it all along!" She laughed.

"I can be awesome sometimes too." He beamed back at her while beginning to set the controls.


End file.
